[Pointedly ignoring the long delay in posting]
For today, we have the World's Best Diet Sodas, ranked by said bestness:
(5) Fanta Orange Zero. The best of the pure "orange" diet sodas. Suitably tangy but with that unnatural "orange" flavor that tastes nothing like an orange but instead like fake orange-flavored things that we grew up with. I am highly disappointed that their advertising agency seems to have forced them to move away from The Fantanas in favor of some crappy group-sourced 2004 Wii avatar nonsense.
(4) Vernor's Diet Ginger Ale. The only diet ginger ale with a true ginger bite to it. Mixes perfectly with many varieties of Jack Daniels.* I am also fond of how the linked website spends several paragraphs describing the brand's history of strong quality control due to family ownership, then notes at the end that it was acquired and is now owned by Dr. Pepper Snapple Group, Inc.
* Still making my way through last June's mammoth shipment of JD specialty brands from bargechasers and lockoutass. Thanks again!
(3) Diet Dr. Pepper. The original gateway drug for me and so many others into the fabulous world of Diet Soda. Unlike most diet sodas,* especially those of the earlier days of the mid-90s, DDP actually had taste. And not just any taste, but one remarkably similar to that of actual Dr. Pepper, making it remarkably simple to just slide right over.
* For example, Diet Coke, which as far as I can tell tastes like unsweetened battery acid.
(2) Stewart's Diet Orange 'N Cream.* The diet soda version of the universe's best frozen treat. Totally different from the standard orange soda. It's not really a cream soda with orange flavor added but really is a creamsicle in diet soda form. Not quite as good as the creamsicle milkshakes that we used to get at the milk stand in Waban,**** but still highly excellent and refreshing.
* As great as the soda is, it always bugs the crap out of me that they can't get the apostrophe correct. The "N" is substituting for "and," meaning that both the "a" and "d" are being deleted, and thus both need to be replaced with an apostrophe. 'N' is correct. 'N is not, unless they are suggesting that it's Diet Orange An Cream. Which they are not.**
** And you should listen to me, because I'm an expert.***
*** Seriously, I co-edited a book on the subject. That can't really be too much of a surprise, can it?
**** OMFG, I totally recognize that building. Wow. Memories. Love the old 'hood. Sad that the bakery appears to be gone though.
(1) Boylan's Diet Black Cherry. Nectar of the gods. Long had I quested for the best of the diet black cherry sodas, and one day I wandered into a random bodega in New York to obtain lunch after a scintillating morning of document review in some faceless nameless conference room* and happened upon Boylan's. It has the perfect mix of sweetness and cherry tart - so many overdo the sweet and just throw in a generic Red-Flavor instead of the real black cherry. I spent years trying to track this stuff down locally** before finally convincing a kind-hearted order clerk at Specs to put in a regular order of several cases for me.
* Thanks to the Dark Gods that I have people to do those sorts of things for me now.
** Of course, you can order it from Amazon and the like, but the shipping costs for bottles of soda are a little too ridiculous, even for me.
Dude! You left out Fresca????? You are dead to me.
ReplyDeleteIt's funny, so many people swear by Fresca but it's just never grabbed me for whatever reason. In fairness, I haven't tried it in many moons but my recollection is that it's rather bland in taste. I tend to not like things with weaker flavors (like most teas, especially iced), so that could be the issue.
ReplyDeleteOr I could just be criminally insane. You never know.
I once blew a coworker's mind by pointing out that Fresca was diet. They'd been drinking it for years and had no idea. Which in turn, boggled my own mind.
ReplyDeleteDiet Dr. Pepper is the only diet soda i'll voluntarily drink... but then I haven't actually tried the other four you've listed, so maybe I need to expand my horizons.
Second on the black cherry -- most excellent. Suggest you try the Reed's diet ginger beer and see what you think, certainly no hiding from the ginger there. Not a fan of the diet cream sodas?
ReplyDeleteBut COME ON NOW, we all know that #1 with a bullet is certainly Canfield's diet chocolate fudge soda. I weep that it isn't available on this coast. Or any of the Polar line of weird diet sodas, including the excellent diet orange dry and the diet grapefruit. I totally swiped my sister's car when we were in Boston just so that I could do a run to the local Star Market to load up.
Madame Stoat -
ReplyDeleteI remember being rather surprised when I first learned that Fresca was a diet soda as well, just because the can (at least back in the day) didn't scream DIET at you, as was the fashion on the time.
As for expanding your diet soda horizons, it really depends what kind of tastes you're into. In my experience, someone is either a black cherry soda kind of person or they aren't. If it sounds at all good to you, check out the Boylan for sure. But if it sounds gross, well, then not so much....
31da9d74 (is it okay if I call you 31da9d74?) -
ReplyDeleteI have seen Reed's but not tried it before; will definitely check it out, as I do love that sharp ginger bite.
I like a nice diet cream soda from time to time, but it's a milder flavor than I generally go looking for.
I dimly remember the Polar sodas from my time Up North, but it has been a while. I recall the Black Cherry being a pretty good example of the genre, although perhaps a bit sweeter than I would ideally prefer. Generally good stuff though.
Finally, while I will gleefully admit to Candield's diet chocolate fudge confection being weird, that is one of the damnedest most terribly accursed things that I have ever consumed (better than the deep-fried oreo and Poland Springs vodka mixed with Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum Soda, but that's all the comes to mind). I assume that it remains available only as a source of pranks and/or to punish the criminally insane.
You cannot let this end with "best diet sodas." Think of future archaeologists trying to piece the narrative together!
ReplyDelete